Diners, Drive Ins and Death

I'm sitting here in the recliner watching one of my favorite TV shows. Its Diners, Drive Ins, and Dives. In this show a guy, named Guy, goes all over the country and finds little holes in the wall where they serve food which, if eaten regularly, will kill you. Every now and again you see a vegetable, but as soon as one appears it is quickly shrouded in lard and fried within an inch of its life.

Every time I watch this show (weekly - I'm hooked) I find myself looking at the charismatic host and wondering why he's alive. He tries all the food on the show and sometimes it looks like he eats more than just one or two bites. Heck, just one or two bites of some of these things would send a person's blood chemistry into orbit.

OK, he was just talking about a deep fried, bacon wrapped hot dog. I think I'll buy stock in statin drugs. In Guy's favor, he's not as lardy as you'd expect. That's not to say he would ever be accused of being thin. At least he looks like he enjoys his job. That might lower his blood pressure a notch.

What's sad is that I know he'll never visit the restaurant where we just ate dinner. The hub and I each had a grilled salmon spinach salad with the dressing on the side. I had a glass of white wine which I feel guilty about because wine is fattening. Now, Guy is eating a hot dog burrito! With cheese. As if I hadn't figured this out already - life just isn't fair!

When I was young and able to eat like a bulimic pig on a binge I didn't realize how lucky I was. I didn't enjoy my food nearly as much as Guy obviously does. I wish I'd have eaten anything with as much relish as Guy is polishing off the chili dog he's working on. And I don't a mean chopped pickle condiment, I mean gusto and enjoyment.

Anyway, I'll continue to watch Diners, Drive Ins and Dives and fantasize about all that melted cheese and fried food. I'll also pray for Guy's arteries. He seems like such a likable guy, I'm not looking forward to reading about him having a stroke or a heart attack. Although then he might show up at my salmon and spinach salad restaurant. We could compare stroke stories. It would make a lousy TV show, but I'd have fun. I bet Guy would, too...