Cookies are Bad

I haven't blogged lately because I've been making cookies. I have a thing about Christmas cookies.When I used to work, I got lots and lots of them for Christmas. And lots and lots. And I ate so many of them that my butt started looking like it needed its own zip code. Finally I decided that I would just taste each kind of cookie then toss the rest. That way, when I told people they were delicious I wouldn't be lying... I'd really know.

The problem with that was that it still added up to forty bazillion calories a day and my behind absorbed every single one of them. I could have solved the problem by having my jaw wired shut but that was impractical since I had to talk to people. Not eating the stuff was out of the question. I have a very acute sense of smell and it makes resistance futile to say the least. As a result of my lack of control, and a whole bunch of meals at the local taqueria, my cholesterol was high enough to stand on and hang Christmas lights on the roof.

And as a result of that, I had a stroke. Long story short, after I rehabbed, the hub and I enrolled in Kaiser's Medical Weight Management Program. We call it Fat Camp. It helped us get the weight off and my cholesterol numbers no longer cause my doctors to clutch their chest and shriek "Dear God, why are you alive?"when they read my chart. I feel better, too.

The problem is that this is my first Christmas cookie baking season since I lost the flab. I am making cookies for my neighbors. I'm making pizzelles, a crisp, Italian, waffle-like disc of deliciousness that is subtly flavored with anise. They don't tempt me like brownies and they're different from everyday Christmas cookies so people won't throw them away. That's my story and I'm sticking to it. Plus, I really love the dough...

So tomorrow is our weekly Fat Camp meeting. I'm not really looking forward to going since right now I'm sitting here with a belly full of pizzelle dough. My butt flab is thrilled but I feel like puking which I won't do because that's bulimia and I will not go there. I just hope I can make it through cookie season and come out the other side still fitting in my jeans. In fact, what I'd really like to do is take off about 5 lbs. I smell a challenge. And, as I said, I have a very acute sense of smell.